Day and night, no matter when you fiercely fight, I cannot contend.
Your tantrum has passed, I am left here alone. You are gone for a while, vacated your throne.
I’ll clean the mess that you left of this place. I’ll clean up the state that you’ve made of my face.
In the name of peace I forgive, I pretend, as I search for a way to tie up all loose ends.
Find my way out that does not mean my death, yet you block my every move, you choke my every breath.
Day and night no matter when, I protect my spirit as you mock and condescend.
I hold a fort that you could never infiltrate, for my love and light is stronger than all your rage and hate.
INSIGHT– This poem has sat untouched for just under two decades. Written at a time when I was in an abusive relationship which seemed to be a trend with myself. It took me a lot of years to realise my choice in men was linked to my childhood and past traumas. It was a pattern I was to repeat for many years with no lessons learned as I became stuck in a dissociated state of mind for years and I was always asking the wrong questions of myself. I am in a good place to be able to share these with you all now, even though I will admit they are a little triggering especially as I remember specific incidents that led to the creation of particular poems (This is one such poem). I hope that as I share my poetry with you all, it will somehow and in some way help others. I am still on my path of discovery and healing, it is a tough path, full of many ups and downs and I am facing my own demons but it is a path I will always choose to walk down.